Anonymous sources at the Los Angeles Sheriff's Department report disturbing anomalies in the Michael Jackson death. "The cadaver is reported to have undergone multiple color changes in the 12 hours after death," reports Dr. James Brent, "Apparently, our sources tell us, the skin rapidly attained an orange hue which faded to be replaced by a greenish tint. Over the course of a couple of hours he was glowing various shades of technicolor."
Brent believes this points to more sinister forces behind the curtain. "The key is that he had recently been training with Lou Ferrigno for his comeback tour. Ferrigno, a former wrestling star, attended two Svensenbanken Regals in the 1980s and is rumored to have acted as a bagman for Swedish interests in their dealings with the contras." Brent also alleges that Jackson had gone to work with MI5 around the same time, and there are rumors that Israeli sub-orbital drones had been used to help promote Bad, Jackson's follow up to hugely successful Thriller. "In some ways," speculates Dr. Brent, "The continued decline of Jackson's career along with the self-destruction of the CIA's sister project, Gun 'n' Roses, represented a loosening of the grip on the cerebral cortex. After their spectacular successes of the '70s, the chemists in Gotenburg had failed to keep up with evolution. Sources tell me that Jackson had decided to tell the story in a concept album to be debuted at a series of 50 concerts in the United Kingdom."
Brent thinks the other shoe may soon drop. "The corpse changing color across red, green and blue after death is a sure sign of extreme Coltanite poisoning."